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Saturday, February 14th, 2004
1:27 am - Connected

I saw a show tonight called "The Last Session" and I was moved in a way I didn't expect. It is such a touching show. I thought that Rent touched me, but Rent never changed me like The Last Session did. I met the composer/lyricist to it (Steve Schalchilin)-- he was also playing the lead role of Gideon (and it's based on his life)...and Steve is such a sweetheart. I loved it when I walked into the lobby and Steve saw me and opened his arms and said, "Come here" and gave me a big hug. I adore him.

But talking with Steve today on campus about the show and about writing for musical theatre, I've now been inspired to just start working on another show.

and why am I telling you all this? Because there's a song in the show called "Connected" and every time I hear that song, I cry like a baby. It is so powerful. It makes me glad that I'm connected to all of you. It makes me happy that I'm connected to everyone in my life. I am so thankful for everyone. I'm so thankful for all of you. I just wanted to share that with you all.

Here's the lyrics to the song...and if you want to hear it, I can probably send it to you over aim. My Screenname is: PixieSwizzleStix ...if you want to hear it. :o)

I love you all!

and if you want to know more about The Last Session or about Steve Schalchilin, go to bonusround.com . It's his blog that he got 6 years ago that he was told to write down his emotions and everything in... he was the 26th person to start blogging. :O)

-Tammers, Cary's Ambitious Freak

--The Last Session by Steve Schalchilin and Jim Brochu.

I saw a neon sign that said, "Emergency."
I barely even know what happened next
Collapsing in a doorway and then, down a hall,
Connected to a meter
We should all be connected to a meter

A very nice young man with three rings in each ear
Said, "We don't lose that many patients in a year."
He rolled me to a lonely room with a light beneath the bed
Connected to a bottle
We should all be connected to a bottle

And every night at 1 a.m.
The angel of the night time
Would wake me up and give me something good
And then give me something bad

All day long I'd channel surf; that's all that I could do
I couldn't read a book or walk around
You know you've hit the bottom when you're glad to be
Connected to a TV
We should all be connected to a TV

I dreamed I was on Happy Days and I was playing Richie
with Potsy begging Richie not to die
'Cause they'd never let Richie die

Friends would come around and bring me little things
Say how much they needed me to live
They told me I would make it cause they said we were
Connected to each other
We should all be connected to each other

Now someday if I lose this fight to carry on
Please send me someplace gently out to sea
Listen as I whisper softly in your ear
"Connected to each other.
We will always be connected to each other."

current mood: peaceful

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Friday, October 24th, 2003
5:09 pm - Hello.

I can never resist a bandwagon, so hey, everyone - I'm Carly. I'm 17, a freshman English major/education minor at Marymount Manhattan College. I've been involved in the Rent fandom for... it'll be five years circa Thanksgiving. I received a copy of the OBCR as a Bat Mitzvah present, and quickly became addicted; I saw the show five months later and the rest is history. I've seen the show 64 times on Broadway (is it sad that I still keep track so clearly?), and would eventually like to check out a tour. Although I've given into temptation a couple of times since getting to school and seen the show merely because I was here (with no previous intentions of doing so), I enjoy it immensely everytime I see it. For as long as it's been a part of my life, it's given me something to believe in even when I was in my constantly relapsing "everything is futile and life sucks" funk - it's brought me some incredible friendships, and also helped me develop a better rapport with people I wouldn't have been nearly as close with otherwise.

My favorite Rent person is Dean Armstrong, who I miss more than... um, a lot of things that people typically miss. In terms of Rentboys, I'm also very much a fan of Colin Hanlon, Joshua Kobak, Curtis Cregan, Matt Caplan, Sebastian Arcelus, Chad Richardson (though I think I prefer his music to his onstageness), and recently have been swept into the new!Roger love of Ryan Link.

And... I could go on, but I need to run away. So goodbye, and howdy! :o)

current mood: full

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12:06 pm - Greetings!

Another introduction. I don't know all of you real well, but I do know a couple of you. I love making new friends, so feel free to friend me, or IM me (PixieSwizzleStix), or something. I've been a member of this community for a while, I've just never really said anything because I haven't had anything to say. I do enjoy reading the posts though.

Greetings everyone! I'm Tammy and I'm 22 (today). :o) I'm originally from Grand Rapids, Michigan, but I'm currently in Anderson, Indiana attempting to finish my B.A. in Theatre and Psychology. I'll graduate in May (as I'm a fifth year senior this year). I'm currently applying to grad schools (for theatre- acting, of course). I'd like to go to a good school on the east coast, but I'm not opposed to the west coast or Chicago. :o)

The first time I saw Rent was in Febuary 2000 -- the Benny Tour in Indianapolis, IN. That started my infatuation with Matt-Matt and Cary. The first time I heard Rent was in 1998...and I fell in love with it immediately. I've only seen it twice in my life (sad, yes, but it's okay)-- the benny tour and the UK tour (The Swan Theatre in High Wycombe, England). It's just a beautiful, beautiful show.

My favorites are Matt Caplan, Cary Shields, Joshua Kobak, Adam Pascal, Taye Diggs, Chad Richardson... the list can go on. Though I love the actors that play Mark, my personal weakness is for the guys who play Roger. I'm very interested in seeing Ryan Link. :o) He amuses me.

Theatre is my passion. Performing is one of the greatest joys I have known. The past 2 years I've been doing a lot of tech work and I've been a "viewer" but I can't stand it any longer. I have to get back on stage. I miss it too much. I have an audition at one of the equity houses in Indianapolis next weekend and I'm planning on going to URTAs (auditions for grad school). I'm directing two one acts for the christmas show at my university, but I'm really ready to ditch directing for a while and jump onstage. It's just a pleasure to know that you can make an impact on someone's life. You can "change men's souls." After I finished "Section 8: Home By Another Name," I was so touched by the response. There were so many women that thanked us for doing it and there were others that actually did start to recognize that this is a big issue (oh, Section 8 was about abused/sheltered men and women). It was so rewarding. I just need to be onstage again. :o)

I'm probably going to be in the city (nyc) in December again (probably around the 19th) so I hope that I can see some of y'all around. :o)

-Tammers, Clay's Ambitious Freak

current mood: loved

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2:32 am - Mememememe

Hi, I'm Amy. ;-) Or ChicagoAmy, whatever. :-) I'm 25, live in Chicago, and am currently working on my masters degree in library and information sciences, which I hope to complete in May...CAN'T WAIT TO BE DONE!!!!!! Right now I work part time for the Chicago Public Library as a circulation desk clerk, and I've been trying to go full time for over two years now but there has been a hiring freeze in effect since 9/11 so I'm stuck where I am at least until graduation.

My first encounter with Rent was actually quite negative, I was on the Les Miserables mailing list back in late 1996 and flamewars started breaking out from people arguing about this new show, those who thought it was amazing vs those who hated it. But then the Rent list at sonic was created and it all moved over there and I don't remember hearing too much more about it until I acquired a video with tv appearances and the OBC CD over the summer from a friend. Thought it was pretty good, decided to go see in December 1997, Angel cast Chicago, and was immediately hooked, it just totally blew me away! While I've kind of stalled out at the moment due to money and distance, I've been very lucky in the opportunities I've had to see the show and have seen the Angel, Benny, Collins, Canadian, and Broadway casts in multiple different cities (primarily Chicago of course) a grand total of 97.5 times. I'm a tour girl, favorite cast ever was the Chicago Angel cast but various Benny tour incarnations are pretty close runners up. Favorite Rent boys have included Jake Manabat, Matt Caplan, Justin Johnston, Enrico Rodriguez, Sebastian Arcelus, Cary Shields, Curtis Cregan, Joshua Kobak, etc.....

I'm a huge fan of Matt Caplan's music and am the original lyrics queen, though sadly I don't think I can rightly claim that title any longer as by the time I get to hear new songs now they're months and months old and have already been transcribed numerous times. :-( I've been lucky enough to attend four Matt/Joshua gigs, one while they were still on tour with Rent and three from the Swimming Sideways tour but have been gig deprived since August 2001. *sob*

As for other interests, I love tons of other shows and spend way too much money going to see them (says she who just got her bill with the charges for the Hairspray tour tickets :-P). I'm quite involved in the Harry Potter fandom, and am a big Ron/Hermione shipper as anyone on my friends list could attest to. ;-) Lord of the Rings ranks way up there too, less than two months to ROTK and Aragorn goodness, whoot!

And I will stop rambling on about myself now. :-)

current mood: mellow

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Thursday, July 17th, 2003
6:11 pm - One song before you go...

Okay maybe not so much a song, but a message.

I just wanted to post this before everyone got out of town. To everyone that is going to be in NYC this weekend doing all the fun things, etc, to HAVE FUN and BE SAFE and remember every little detail for those of us who are geographical challenged.
Squeeze the Boys a few times for me. (Okay does that sound really bad or what? You know what I mean!)
I'll be here waiting to hear all about it!

current mood: drained

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Wednesday, July 16th, 2003
6:26 pm - For once the shadows gave way to light...

I wanted to post today because I have this "connection" that I feel the need to talk about and that is what this community is for, right? SO....
Hopefully this introspective post will not scare you all.

For those of you who don't know, I live in Arkansas and I am married and even though I love my husband, I also have a slight crush ::pauses for those who know me to laugh about my use of the word SLIGHT:: on Sebastian. This is really not about that though.
This is about the person who understands that and embraces that with me.
I know that pretty much everyone "loves" Sebastian. He is that kind of guy. Everyone has their "fave" Rent person that they connect with, or just dig, for whatever reason. Very few of us would say that Sebastian is that #1 person for them. He is for me. And he is for Kait and I am so happy that we have that to share. When I was in NYC, I was a little overwhelmed by the crowd and at times, I felt self-conscious about gushing over Seb, since every person that I was there with already knew him very well and really could care less. (And I do not mean that in a bad way....I love all y'all) But Kait was there and it was okay to gush with her.

Flashback to last night: I have had 2 really pretty crappy days. I mean honestly. Marriage is hard, but I won't go into all the stuff that caused me the bad days. But yeah, I felt like absolute crap, depressed and having an existential crisis, if you will. I was pretty much in mid-fight in this really extended fight with the husband when I read Kait's post in here about Seb!Mark. Now I LOVE Seb!Roger (shut up) and I want more than anything to see Seb!Mark, but the realist in me knows that the odds of this are VERY slim. So while I LOVED what she posted last night about Seb!Mark, it hit me hard that I would never see it.
I FriendsLocked this crazy rant, which was kind of hard for me because I am a pretty private person. (True Cancer the crab really) and Kait, Julie, and MaDonna all posted amazing support messages that made me feel completely loved. I wasn't looking for sympathy really, but I felt like I got some and I really appreciated it.

Today, I am still sad and icky and on top of that, I have to go to the dentist! NOT loving being me at the moment.
But on my way home, my cell rings and I hear, "mumble....Vampire Welfare Queens..." Well, I expected it to be Sebastian and there was a tad bit of confusion on my part, but when Roger started singing, I knew that I was hearing Sebastian. "The film maker cannot see" was all I needed. That one little bit of song completely transformed my mood and made me okay again.
And Kait, you knew that would happen.

My cell rings again a few minutes later and I heard Sebastian singing "Your Eyes." I will spare you the girly crushy omg teenybopper bit now, but, yeah, I love him singing that song. He just kicks ass on that song. And I got to hear it. And I never thought I would hear it live again. And I did. And it made me cry and get out all the emotion I had been going through these past few days.
Kait, I tried to call you a little while after, but when I picked up the phone, I couldn't do it because I was still all weepy. I didn't want to be all stupid when we talked...

But anyway, Kait, I know that you have a whole slew of people that you share things with. You have so many friends and people that adore you and l am just one little far-away person out of a big bunch that you think of when you walk into that theatre. But when you called me today, I knew that you KNEW what I needed. And I will never be able to do anything even remotely close to repay you for that, but I wanted to say THANK YOU. I appreciate it more than you will ever know.
Thanks for getting it.

And that is probably far more than you ever wanted to know, but it is a big part of who I am and how I feel right now. I just wanted to put it down and let Kait and all of you know...
I consider myself really lucky to live vicariously through you guys. I really do. I love it. So thank you to all of those who have friended me and let me share in some of the Rent-related love!

current mood: calm

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